Princess Nalovia and The Cannon

As told by Mr. WLA

Once upon a time in the far away about eighty years ago there lived a magic cannon princess and what made her different from other princesses was that she collected cannons from all over the world. Her name was Princess Nolovia and she owned many, many cannons, big cannons, small cannons, cannons that shook the ground when they went off and cannons that would no more belch as they sent their cargo skyward.  She owned red cannons, blue cannons, yellow cannons and cannons with exotic flowers painted on the side and cannons embedded with rhinestones and glitter and others with elaborate scenes of marching tin soldiers inlaid on the cannon’s wheels forever marching into tomorrow.

Princess Nolovia was just a young girl of 19 when she began collecting cannons and at 24 she ran away the Zarcatti Brothers’ Circus and toured with them as the first woman cannonball and was the envy of many of the great circus acts of her time. Princess Nolovia held the record for the longest distance launched from a cannon for decades, until she beat her own record by having herself launched into the middle of next Tuesday. She held this record until her retirement at the age of 79.

Although Princess Nolovia retired she never lost the wanting of bright lights, cotton candy, hotdogs, candied apples the smell of fresh popped kettle corn. Even the bark of midway carnies had become music to her ears.

So as not to be deprived in her later years she bought up the biggest parcel of land that was available on the outskirts of town. And once a year, mid-year, she would have her people set up the most colorful of tents. Three.

Once the flag from above the largest tent was unfurled Princess Nolovia would send out fliers far and wide asking for clowns, happy cows and a high flying trapeze team. Also included in the request: Two elephants, an old tiger, an aging bear, out of work carnies and one giant Ferris wheel.

And so every year, mid-year the entire town looked forward to Princess Nolovia's Circus of Many Wonders.

The day before the grand opening Princess Nolovia’s team would roll her grandest of all cannons out onto the midway. All polished and shimmering the cannon whispered grand.

And every year, mid-year the entire town’s anticipation would grow as the postman would deliver 25 invitations to 25 selected children.

The invitation:

Child of the heart, in this day and age when magic and wonder seem to be disappearing in leaps and bounds, it's refreshing to encounter people such as you. After hours and hours of review of who’s been naughty and who’s been nice, you have been selected to partake in a group human cannon ball flight into a 40 foot mountain of freshly spun cotton candy.  On behalf of all that is magical throughout this wonderful land I do hope you will extend yourself to experience softness beyond your wildest dreams.

Sincerely Princess Nolovia.

On opening night, after the clowns clowned, The Flying Merry-Weathers flew, and all the animals did what old animals do, all lights across the midway dimmed as two clowns propped a candy stripped ladder against the cannon’s inviting O.

One by one, the 25 children, some laughing and some just giggling climbed the ladder and one by one they slid slowly down O’s tunnel until they came to the little handholds just above little pillowed seats, they settled in. Excited, they talked of all the softness they had known up until now and how wonderful it would be to mix soft with flying. It was almost too much to think about

As the band played on Princess Nolovia ordered her cannon bearer to slowly crank the cannon into position, slowly upward and with each tick of the crank the crowd cheered,  the cannon's mouth arched 20 degrees above the candied mountain, the crowd cheered even louder than before, 40 degrees, now the cheering slipped into yelling: Higher! Higher!  60 degrees above the mountain of dreams…

The crowd was going crazy. “All the way, all the way” they screamed.

Inside O, one by one, the children slid from their pillows, one by one each lost hold of the handholds and one by one they inched to the back of O as she lifter her heavy neck skyward. Soon, against their best efforts they began to wiggled into a cannon ball. Terrified they heard the crowd counting.

10-9-8-7-

 The cannon rose higher.

6-5-4-

And one by one, each child saw the moon take place of the candied mountain.

3-2-

The crowd looked toward The Magic Cannon Princess.

1

Princess Nolovia bowed to the crowd as the loudest boom of the year spoke belligerently. 

O bellowed and 25 children, one by one led a whoosh and a snazle-fizzle as they trailed into the summer night sky, and one by one, going separate ways they burst into the greatest light shower ever witnessed with bright reds, blues, sunburnt orange, violet and lilac. Some became teal before green. And others before going out, burst again with bright shades of silver, enticing the crowd to reach a frenzy of delight with ahhhh and oooooohhhhs.

The End.

The moral of this tale boys and girls is that just because you receive a request from a princess; never assume that when she says naughty and nice, that you have been the nice one.

More on what happens to children who find it necessary to play with matches time and time again after being told not to do so, can be found at your local library.

Comments

[Carol]

I wish someone would shot me out of a cannon.
Great story.

[Sandy]

how quickly one can forget those stories of yor - those gems that shaped our fragile little moral characters growing up. Why, they are the reason I always remember to keep the night light burning..the closet door closed and never, ever let my hand drape over the side of the bed at night.
Princess Nolovia's Circus of Many Wonders is, for those fortunate enough to have been in attendance, THE wonder of many wonders...AND FAR OVER-SHADOWING "The Benefit of Mr. Kite".
And the moral of that is..the white owl has many times been mistaken for Verona!! (in a boy's dream..)
Sandy :)

[Alvin]

Carol, That is exactly how I feel at times except with my luck the damn thing would misfire and just as I would be crawling out of the mouth of O, it would kick in... I can't imagine how much that would hurt.

Thanks for stopping in.
=A=

Very well said Sandra, I agree, all I need do is rest my soul for a few minutes and all the childhood deamons spring forth form the shadows in dark corners. Oh how I've missed them at times. Once terrifying, they are now just playful little creatures.

Bumps in the night tho, still spring me awake in a heartbeat.

[Sasha]

I came here to see something sordid and in bad taste and I get a fairy tale instead. Not that I didn't love the fairy tale but I would like a bit of scandal now please.

[Alvin]

Oh, don't get me wrong Sasha, I do, do bad taste and scandal. Like, Jesus was not one of the original Bee Gees, so why did they portray him that way, he was much shorter I'm sure, you know with the time and all.